i am a heated mess. Yes, finishing homework and tasks feels good, but lately they keep coming too fast to allow any time for satisfaction or they just don't get finished even through days-long cycles of sleeplessness and experimental caffeine cocktails. Physical fitness is a joke. So are all of my secondary and tertiary goals. So are social interactions, despite having knowing and being known my greatest needwants at the moment.
These convictions and decisions regarding my relationship with Tae might just obliterate me. or maybe they will free me. Either way, i'm dead.
In the midst of all of my "i don't know"'s (i really should get that tattooed on my forehead to save time and breath), i have His spirit guiding me and revealing wisdom and things that are Right, and i give up all choices now but to listen and to follow.
In the midst of all my wretched foolishness, hunger, fear, and pathetic depraved unworthiness, He knows and He Loves me.
God, let that be enough.
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